Lazy Self-Indulgent Book Reviews

Dec 31, 2013

An Interview With Francesca Lia Block

Welhouse: I also got a couple marriage proposals to pass on to you, overwhelmingly from young women.

Block: [laughs] I was going to guess they were from young women! My boyfriend is always saying to me, “It’s the girls! It’s those girls. We go anywhere for those readings, and that’s who comes up to you.” I’m waiting for some 50-year-old man to come up, but it’s always young women.

Welhouse: Well, now I can tell them that I’ve passed their messages on.

Block: Wait. One thing. Tell them that I love them, too. Because believe me, I fall in love with all my readers so often. They’re amazing women. So, thank them, from my heart.

Dec 30, 2013

Brief Interviews With Childfree Men

Six dudes who’ve chosen not to have kids talk to our interviewer, a woman who’s chosen not to have kids either.

Dec 30, 2013

A Note From Ani DiFranco

Hi. I’m Ani DiFranco. You may remember me from such things as singing like a wizard trapped inside an aged toad is trapped inside of my throat and being allergic to capital letters. I’m here to talk to you about something that’s very close to my heart today: writing songs on old slavery plantations.

Like all the best satire, Mallory’s is almost indistinguishable from the original.

Dec 25, 2013

"In 1736 I lost one of my sons, a fine boy of four years old, by the small-pox, taken in the common way. I long regretted bitterly, and still regret that I had not given it to him by inoculation. This I mention for the sake of parents who omit that operation, on the supposition that they should never forgive themselves if a child died under it; my example showing that the regret may be the same either way, and that, therefore, the safer should be chosen."

—Oh, look, BEN FRANKLIN knew more about vaccination than half of the people on Facebook in 2013. (From "The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin")

Dec 23, 2013

Why You Should Rewatch "The Nanny"

If you can hear “The Nanny” referenced without humming “she was working in a bridal shop…” we are very different people.

Dec 19, 2013

A Few Thoughts on The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

1. Let me fix you, Thorin Oakenshield. (cue the Coldplay montage)

2. Why are Thorin and Kili (and, arguably, Fili) totally legit, human-looking, attractive men, andeveryone elselooks like they are actually a different species?

3. Like, if you saw Thorin or Kili at a bar, you’d say “well, they’re short, but at night all cats are grey,” or some other Victorian euphemism for “10/10 would bang,” but if you saw, say, Balin, you would probably call the army.

Go read! It’s only my favourite topic.

Dec 13, 2013

Femslash Friday: Rory/Paris

Not only is this the best, she says THIS about Jess:

Jess – Worthless. Worse than worthless. At the time, of course, we did not yet know that loving a man who enjoys Kerouac novels was morally wrong — the science wasn’t quite there yet — but we already knew that Jess’ busy wall-leaning schedule wasn’t leading anywhere good. I will not go so far as to accuse him of wearing leather bracelets, but he seems exactly the type of man who would do so, given half the chance at an 18+ concert. “Oh, I’m too consumed by my own inner pain to arrive to events on time.” “I invented record stores; guess how many cigarettes I can fit into my mouth.” “I love you so much I moved to California without telling you.” “How can you expect me to plan a date, I’m too full of smoldering emotionsto know what day of the week it is.” He wrote a book called The Subsect. I will listen to nothing good about this jean-jacket-festooned wastrel. Begone, you gel-smeared, sneering fop. You are no Ryan Atwood. You have no heart of gold underneath those ill-fitting wifebeaters. Take your baby-boy-Pink act on the road. Your powers will not work here.

Dec 10, 2013

The First Six Sherlock Episodes, Ranked

Obviously, I had to return to Tumblr to share my masterpiece with you.

Nov 8, 2013

Femslash Friday: Kaylee/Inara

Kaylee/Inara is the Firefly Femslash you’ve been waiting for all your life.

Nov 1, 2013

Muriel Rukeyser (1913-1980): The Forgotten Woman

Why didn’t you read Muriel Rukeyser in college?

Oct 29, 2013

“…Octavia and Judith Butler? Bodies That Matter, tuxes that flatter.”
From "Trick, Treat, or Overthrow: Advanced Feminist Cosplay"
(this is my new favourite thing!  bell “captain” hooks!)

…Octavia and Judith Butler? Bodies That Matter, tuxes that flatter.”

From "Trick, Treat, or Overthrow: Advanced Feminist Cosplay"

(this is my new favourite thing!  bell “captain” hooks!)

Oct 28, 2013

Name That Book: The Return

Over at The Toast, we’re talking about hazy memories of books we read as kids, and crowdsourcing to figure out authors and titles!  It’s a lot of fun, and maybe you could help? Here’s my three mystery books:

1. It’s a girl whose mom is dead, and she has, like, a book of leaves that her mom had pressed, and she and her dad move to a new house, and I think her dad marries a new wife with a kid, and the kid destroys the book of leaves.

2. Dystopian underground society, boy is trained from birth to remember strings of numbers, eventually has to, like, use this ability to activate/deactive a weapon? Chilly father figure.

3. This one is NOT Half Magic. It’s a kid who gets sent back to Arthurian times during a field trip, or some such thing, and his mom is too, and she keeps waiting for the cream tea she was promised in the brochure. This one is making me really nuts, so please help.

Reblogging encouraged, because I’m beginning to think I just dreamt up #3.

Oct 22, 2013

Sunday Sauce, Saving Me

Jessica Valenti wrote this incredible piece for us about a very difficult choice she faced this year, and I’m so proud to have it on our site.

Oct 16, 2013

From “My Female Students Don’t Seem As Impressed With Me As They Used To”

HANK: “It’s getting harder and harder to awe these inexperienced female teenagers these days, Smitty.”

SMITTY: “Tell me about it, Hank.”

HANK: “Just yesterday, in one of my intro classes, I used the word ‘problematic’ in a sentence — real casual, just to let them know I’m one of the good guys — and not one of them stayed after the lecture to ask me just what I meant by that or to see if they could borrow the conspicuously dog-eared copy of Pedagogy of the Oppressed I like to leave on my desk in case any female students want to borrow it.”

SMITTY passes the bottle back to HANK.

SMITTY: “Things are bad all over.”

HANK: “You know, it’s very important to me that I be thought of as down.”

SMITTY: “Amen.”

HANK: “That copy has my phone number in it. You know, the old ‘write your phone number on the front page of a copy you lend to female students only under the “IF LOST PLEASE RETURN TO” bubble’ gag?”

SMITTY: “It’s a great gag.”

HANK passes the bottle back to SMITTY.

[read more]

Oct 16, 2013

Nine Stupid Pieces of Baby Gear Which I Do Not Regret Buying

I don’t do a lot of mommy-blogging stuff, but here’s a rare lapse.