I’m at Whole Foods, buying, like, food, when I see an employee setting up a large display at the end of the produce section.
I see numerous jugs of maple syrup. I am surprised.
I see large bottles of lemon juice. I am suspicious.
I see jars of cayenne pepper. I know.
Employee sees my Dolores Umbridge expression.
"Um, are you ACTUALLY putting up a Master Cleanse station?"
He looks tired, suddenly.
"It’s this, or have people ask me where the individual ingredients are for the entire month of January."
We exchange a meaningful look of ex-retail solidarity, and I wander off, vainly looking for full-fat yogurt.