Lazy Self-Indulgent Book Reviews

YOU GUYS, I AM TOTALLY PREGNANT, and it has been IMPOSSIBLE not to tell you!!!!!!

I have SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT IT, like “SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT” and “Do we have to start eating while sitting down at a table now, like GROWN-UPS?” and “WILL THE BABY BE LAZY, OR INDUSTRIOUS??”

Industrious Husband, although slightly bemused at my ability to get pregnant fifteen seconds after ditching the condoms, as opposed to the “six to twelve months” I had described as standard-issue, is very excited, the dog sleeps determinedly on my side of the bed now, and my glorious and talented midwife answers her email ON THE WEEKENDS, so I feel (eewwwww, gross) blessed, and shit.

I am also prepared to answer even the most gruesome questions to benefit the species, so, ask away.

OH, and for the record, the three months of constant nausea and exhaustion have only strengthened my commitment to reproductive rights.

Also, I told you BEFORE I told Facebook, because I love you.